My mom was all for being opened it was my dad that had hang ups about discussing sexuality openly. so my mom told me about sex for my dad thought the birds and the bees was good enough....more like confusing lol even tho I played sports I think because I was raised by my mom I always have had a feminine side to me more then most guys. What I mean by this is at f******n I dressed up as a women for Halloween most guys would do it as a joke, but I actually liked it it felt comforting. little did I realize why,first I thought maybe I was I was leaning towards being gay.but that did not make any sense for I was still sexually attracted to women. so I made the bad decisions of putting this issue on hold until now at the age of 33....not such a good idea lol I realize these days I do not want to be a woman just like women's panties and certain clothes and wigs.this also brings up another issue that was unresolved form my early twenties and that was my attraction to transsexuals. instead of. Not out of control exactly but nearly. I scared myself, I guess. And afterwards – well, I just felt awful.”“It sound like you did exactly the right thing, then. Sometimes I think that tops need a safe word too.”“I didn’t mean to upset Lionel, it really wasn’t his fault. It was just that I was rougher than I ever thought I could be. And, well,...”“And...”“Well, I made use of him. Grabbed him and just, well, used his face. He must have been shocked.”“Possibly. But I suspect that he was as excited by it as you were at the time. Probably more.”“And now I don’t know what to do. I promised you I would treat Lionel fairly but if I feel like that over something so simple, well, I don’t know if I can carry on, or even if I should. And, I suppose, I surprised myself. I could never have thought that I would get pleasure out of something like that, of having him helpless and sobbing from being punished by me. Even if he did deserve it, should I have enjoyed it?”“I’m not sure if it’s a question.
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